the audacity to lope

Failure is Not the End

Today is the first day of my next Dana-Farber Marathon Challenge. There are 363 days until the 2011 Boston Marathon; let’s hope I make it in one piece this time. As I stood watching the marathon yesterday, I wondered to myself what was harder - standing on the sidelines and cheering on my teammates or actually running the race? Next year, I’ll be able to answer that question. What I do know is that I’ve never been more motivated than I am today after watching all of my friends run by me at mile 24, knowing that they were about to accomplish something amazing.

Looking back, I couldn’t help but feel like a failure after I got injured in February. Of course, everybody reassured me that “you tried hard” and “you couldn’t help getting injured” - which I knew was entirely true. But when you set a goal and do not accomplish it, you have failed. What kept me going was knowing that failure was not the end of the journey, and there was no dishonor or shame in this particular failure. Lacking the gift of prose, I couldn’t articulate these thoughts when I posted about the injury in February. Fortunately, my friend Andrew pointed out that Teddy Roosevelt already took care of that:

“It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.”

The interesting thing about this experience is that in my professional life, failure is recognized as an inevitability for the majority of startups I work with. And contrary to there being any shame involved, many entrepreneurs who have failed are seen as having learned more than those who have succeeded. They bear the scars of not having achieved what they set out to do, but they wear those scars with pride. Above all, the past failure makes them even more committed to succeed at their next venture.

I believe I am also that person, who, having failed once, is even hungrier the second time around.

I also learned today that I can continue to receive donations for the 2010 Challenge for several months. If you are so inclined, please donate. I’m well shy of my original goal of $10,000.

I’m not running, but YOU can still donate

Copied below is a letter I wrote to my sponsors for the DFMC this year. While their donations were intended to “sponsor” my run, the real recipient of the money is the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute and the fight against cancer. It doesn’t really matter that I’m not running the marathon, although I’d give anything to be able to do it this Monday. Instead, I’m rehabilitating my ankle and aiming for another marathon next October…

————————————————————————————————————————- As you may already know, a stress fracture in my ankle has forced me to withdraw from the 2010 Marathon and defer my entry to 2011. At the time I was sidelined I had logged over 360 total training miles, culminating in my longest run of 15.5 miles on February 13th. I can’t point to a specific cause of the injury aside from bad luck and an accumulation of wear and tear. This marathon business is rough, but most people can tolerate it if they train correctly. I was feeling great and was ahead of schedule - both on my training and fundraising efforts.

Unfortunately, my body broke down. Today marks the first full day I’ve walked without an immobilizer boot since mid-February. I’m feeling better, but the injury is not yet completely healed. My hope is that I’ll be running again by May, which leads me to my new goal for “earning” your sponsorship dollars: the Marine Corps Marathon in Washington, DC on October 31, 2010. I’ve trained through the coldest parts of winter, and now I’ll be training through the hottest parts of the summer.

I want to thank you again for your generous donation as well as your support over the past months. With your help, I’ve raised over $5,000 for this amazing cause. I will not be running the Marathon on Monday, but your donations will still make a difference in the lives of current and future cancer patients. If all goes well for me, I’ll be joining the DFMC team again next year with my eyes on the 2011 Boston Marathon. The war against cancer will continue, and I’ll be doing my part to fight this terrible disease. Thank you for joining me.

Sincerely,
Mark Loranger

$5,000

Just a quick note that I hit the $5,000 mark on my fundraising effort today. Thanks to all of my sponsors!

Marine Corps Marathon 2010, Boston 2011. I just need to get this damn cast off first!!!

A Glutton For Punishment

My body has told me in no uncertain terms that I shouldn’t run a marathon. What of it? I may be fragile, but I’m also stubborn as hell (bordering on stunade, as my grandfather would have said). So yesterday I deferred my Boston Marathon entry, allowing me the opportunity to run it in 2011 instead. On top of that, I entered my name in the lottery for the New York marathon, which takes place next fall. I told all of you that I’ll be running a marathon, and I don’t intend to throw in the towel quite yet. It just so happens that I’ll be running it a little later than initially planned.

That being said, I hope that I will continue to receive donations for the DFMC. Many of you told me that you’d gladly give to the cause. I won’t be running on April 19, but you have my word that I will run a marathon to earn your sponsorship dollars. My ability to run on April 19 will not make a difference in the lives of current and future cancer patients, but your donations will.

Damn.

Two weeks ago, I heard the words that any runner fears the most: stress fracture. I could spend several paragraphs explaining the disappointment, anger, and frustration I’ve been dealing with since I got the news, but that wouldn’t change anything. The fact is that I will not be running the Boston Marathon this year because my body has let me down. I will only say that I did everything physically possible to make it to April, and I am not disappointed in myself for lack of commitment or effort.

I’ve run 360 miles since I began training for the marathon in October. My longest run went for a distance of 15.5 miles and took me about 2 hours and 30 minutes to complete. While I didn’t realize the severity of my injury at the time, I was basically running on a broken ankle. The pain was bad, but I was so focused on the running that I thought I could make it to April. Unfortunately, to continue running would jeopardize my long-term health and likely necessitate surgery. Despite the incredible emotional and physical investment I’ve made in this endeavor, I need to maintain some perspective. As my Dad said, there’s always next year.

More importantly, I’ve raised almost $5,000 for the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute. I feel like this is an immense accomplishment for a cause that I care deeply about. Unfortunately, that is only halfway to my goal of $10,000. I made a commitment to the DFMC and I’m not about to stop with two months left. My story has dramatically changed, but the cause I’m supporting has remained the same. Instead of running, I’ll be volunteering to help the amazing folks at Dana-Farber who form the backbone of the team. I can’t be out there running with my teammates, but I can continue to support them from the sidelines.

I don’t really know how to ask people to sponsor me for a race I won’t be running, so I need to figure that out now. Any suggestions would be much appreciated. Thanks for all the support you’ve given me during these past four months. Every little note on this blog, facebook, email, etc. has meant a great deal.

A PERSONAL LETTER TO FAMILY, FRIENDS AND COLLEAGUES

By now, you’ve probably heard that I’m running the 2010 Boston Marathon as a member of the Dana-Farber Marathon Challenge (DFMC). You may also know that I’m not really a runner, so you should probably be questioning my sanity. With that in mind, this letter is to explain why I’m running my first marathon in April, and to ask for your support.

As you may know, my Mother lost her battle with a rare form of uterine cancer last April. She was 67 years old, full of life and had much left to give. I’m still deeply affected by what happened to my Mom, and I struggle to understand how the healthiest and most energetic person I knew could be gone. However, I refuse to allow this tragedy define my experience with this terrible disease. For every story like mine, I know that there are many other stories of hope, recovery and survival. So I’m doing what I can to enable more of those positive outcomes by supporting the efforts of the scientists on the front lines of the war against cancer.

The DFMC raises funds for the Claudia Adams Barr Program, which supports the work of the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute’s best young scientists in a variety of basic research disciplines. In my career, I’ve had the opportunity to gain a unique perspective into the hard work and dedication of the scientists and researchers behind every innovation. What I’ve learned is that the younger and less established scientists often have the most trouble securing funding. Every penny that I raise goes directly to these researchers. These funds are particularly crucial because they go towards the cutting-edge research that is often ignored by traditional grant organizations because it is so experimental. In my mind, this is the work that will lead to the revolutionary – not evolutionary – discoveries. I truly believe that the knowledge and innovation resulting from this research will one day lead to improved treatments, better cure rates, and perhaps even a real cure.

The 2010 Boston Marathon takes place on April 19, which is exactly one year to the day from my Mother’s death in 2009. Running my first marathon on this particular day will be something for me and my family to celebrate; not only because I ran the marathon, but also (and more importantly) for reaching my personal fundraising goal of $10,000. I am not alone in choosing the DFMC as a way to turn my personal experience with cancer into a call to action. Over 500 like-minded teammates will join me in the DFMC – each of us training through the bitter winter to run the marathon in April and collectively raise $5 million dollars for this critical cause.

I ask that you join me by contributing to this effort in any way that you can. To sponsor me, please visit my personal fundraising page at www.rundfmc.org/2010/markl where you can make an electronic donation with a credit or debit card. If you prefer to write a check, please make it out to the Dana-Farber Marathon Challenge and send it to my address: 286 River St, Unit 1, Cambridge, MA 02139. You can also contribute to my efforts by sharing your own story for my motivation and support. I’m keeping track of this journey on my blog – www.markloranger.com – and would love to hear from you. Comments are enabled above each post that I make. If you’re not comfortable with public disclosure but would still like to share your personal thoughts, please send an email that I will keep private. We’ve all experienced cancer in one way or another and each person has a story to tell. With your help, more and more of these stories will be of survival and healing, and one day we will reach the ultimate goal of the DFMC: a world without cancer.

Thank you!
Mark Loranger
603.799.2234

Attn: Tumblr DFMC Friends

Some of us last night were talking about running along the marathon course tomorrow instead of out in Lexington. If you’re interested in joining, let me know. I’m trying to cobble together a group and then figure out where we should start, refuel, etc…

Google Buzz

I just started using Google Buzz. It’s automatically available if you use gmail. Seems like a cool hybrid of RSS, Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, etc. May be a little overwhelming with all the content it’s pulling. If you sign up, add me and I’ll do the same to you!

In order to get Buzz to pull in your blog posts on Tumblr, you need to add a little bit of code into your tumblog. Basically, the code communicates back to google to confirm that it is indeed you on the other end. The instructions for setting it up can be found here:

http://www.google.com/buzz/bradfitz/PPjHXDhANAC/Want-to-connect-your-blog-or-some-other-feed-to

Acupuncture? Why not!

At the recommendation of a couple friends, I tried acupuncture as a way to treat the various ailments I’m always whining about. My treatment was on Sunday, which was a day after my 12.75 mile long run last week. I was definitely ready to get some relief. I didn’t really expect to be “healed”, but I figured at the very least it would be a relaxing experience and a definite stress reliever. In that regard, I was not disappointed. Needless to say, it didn’t hurt a bit!

It was an enjoyable and relaxing hour and I left the session feeling better, both in my foot and hip. The foot pain wasn’t gone, but it was less acute than before. And the hip felt MUCH better. As of today, though, the foot is back to normal (bad). To be fair, the acupuncturist did tell me that I’d probably need several treatments. I’d heard this from others as well, so it wasn’t a surprise. Unfortunately, I’ll need to start a fundraiser for my fundraiser called: “Sponsor Mark’s Acupuncture So He Can Run the Marathon that You Already Sponsored”.

Beyond the needling, there was a second piece of my treatment that was even stranger. After explaining that I had some knots in my back, it was recommended that I get a Cupping treatment. Basically, it involves applying suction cups to locations on your back where there is “stagnation”, e.g. knots. Considering that I just voluntarily had someone stick needles all over my body, this seemed pretty tame. Unfortunately, I was wrong. Those suction cups hurt! And to top it off, it looks like I have crop circles all over my back! So much for going to the beach this week…

In summary, the verdict is still out on acupuncture’s therapeutic effects for my specific injuries. However, I did enjoy the session and felt generally “better” after I left. I also got a couple sweet new tattoos. I wouldn’t recommend cupping though - I think the same outcome can be achieved through clinical massage without the nasty crop circles. I’d love to hear what other people think about these types of alternative medicine and what has worked for them - particularly runners!

Running Tumblrs… Runblrs?

Caitie is a fellow DFMC teammate and a great blogger. She gave me a nice shout-out in her blog below and I think she does a great job on her blog, both in writing her own stuff and also reposting some great content she finds out there on the interwebs…

runcaitierun:

So a few posts back I asked you guys for some recommendations for running tumblogs — you know, blogs that are really focused on running and loving to run, rather than running as a means to an end (usually weight loss.*) Ironically enough, nearly everyone that left answers and/or commented to share my frustration were, themselves, among the few that I would count as running-focused tumblrs.

Losingweightinthecity asked me to make a list of some of the ones I follow/like, so here it is, in no particular order:

• This Runner’s World (ambertherunner)

Amber writes about training, what it’s like to identify as a runner, and blogs some awesome inspirational quotes from time to time. It’s nice because she writes a lot about her personal experience, and she doesn’t get bogged down in the “I ran this many miles in this much time and did intervals and blah blah blah technical running talk.”

• RUN This Town

Eric is a fellow Dana-Farber Marathon Challenge teammate who blogs about running, fund raising and deep thoughts like “I need to stop carbo-loading on beer.” No Eric. No you don’t.

• The Audacity to Lope (markloranger)

Mark is another fellow DFMCer and is training for his first marathon. His blog title is pretty awesome. He doesn’t blog super often, but when he does he writes about his trials, tribulations, injuries and fundraising.

• Leave Fear In Your Dust

Justin is my boyfriend (and training partner) and thus I am probably contractually obliged to list him here. If he blogged every time he ate a cheeseburger, he would be the most prolific blogger of all time.

• I Can See New York City From My House

Stephanie blogs about lots of things, including running. She is training for the New Jersey Marathon in May with Team in Training for Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and is generally hilarious.

• Running on Empty

Laurel! Where have you gone?! Laurel is an awesome running blogger who has been MIA for a month or so. She blogs about running in NYC, what she eats, and how many pairs of gloves she has to wear during winter runs. She is also running the Boston Marathon this year, but as a qualifier.

• Life is all a memory but for that quick moment (emilyfarls)

I really dig Emily’s “Why do you run?” series.

Honorable mentions: Weight loss and training blogs

• My sister, Abby and our friend, Carrie are on a journey to become “plexorexic,” the Boston College term for gym rat. (The gym at BC is named The Flynn Recreation Complex, and students call it the Plex for short.) As most diligent college students, all they do is drink, so this makes their journey a difficult one. Follow their farcical attempts at exercise and getting healthy… their blogs have more than once made me laugh out loud at work. Examples of their stunning prose:

“Needless to say, no one (including Abby) wanted to join me at the plex on Thursday, so I did a quick 30 minute run, and some gentle arm weights, followed by a night of heavy drinking.” (Carrie)

and:

“There really is nothing worse than going to the gym and seeing all the teeny girls in their yoga pants and colorful tank tops (pretty sure most of them don’t even wear sports bras) prancing away on the ellipticals.

How did they get so tiny, exerting so little effort?” (Abby)

• I also enjoy Shedding It & Getting It, a fitness blog with hilarious posts on topics such as the “Standing-room only dress (n.): a dress so short that one must stand while wearing it out of fear of flashing her undercarriage when standing back up after sitting down.” and how to have a “Cardio Power Hour.”

*There is nothing wrong with wanting to lose weight, as long as you’re doing in a healthy way that will help your body become/remain strong. Sadly, a lot of the weight loss blogs I’ve skimmed are, as icanseenewyorkcityfrommyhouse pointed out, unhealthy. Including one on the Health/Fitness directory page. Tumblr, get it together and get the pro-ana sites outta here please?